Rough Day

Yesterday was a rough day. As most of you know my grandma has Alzheimer's disease. Yesterday was not one of her good days. She is having a difficult time letting her freedom go, which is understandable. She has been a very independent woman for more than 65 years and now it has been taken away from her. Her mind can no longer handle the things she did for so many years.

Grandma cooked dinner almost every night growing up. She cooked dinner for 9 of us every week night. It was a part of my life until the day I moved away. She is no longer able to cook dinner for everyone. She just can't remember how to get it all done. Grandma no longer drives. It was a family decision that she would be much safer not driving and we also would not have to worry about her not being able to find her way home. Grandma hates this. She hates other people taking her places and her not be able to go where she wants when she wants. I know it has to be hard because I can't even imagine not being able to get in my car and go.

Grandma has also lost her sense of reason. You can try all you want, but she cannot reason anymore. She just doesn't get it and she will argue till the end. Yesterday was one of those days. She had it in her head she was going to walk to a close by shopping center to do some shopping and get her jewelery cleaned. The shopping center is close, but on a very busy road. There is no way of knowing if she would be able to make it there and back without getting lost or run over.

She informed my grandpa of her plans and he told her he would just stay home and take her where ever she wanted to go. This caused a huge fight. Unfortunatly for my grandpa he takes most of the heat. She is usually mad at him for something. He ended up going on to the office and letting my mom know once he got there. Mom called Doneece to go up to grandma's and grandpa's to check on grandma.

Doneece was not ready for what she was about to deal with and I wish she would have never had to see grandma that way. Grandma was very mad that Doneece was there and made it clear that she did not want Doneece there. She keep calling Doneece Ann, I don't think she got it right once. Grandma can be very mean and she was. Grandma thinks we do not trust her, love her or care for her any longer. She thinks Caroline, who is 4, has more freedom than she does. Believe me, we would not let Caroline walk to the shopping center either, but of course you can't tell grandma this.

Doneece suffered a few hours with a very mad grandma and made it until my mom could get there. Mom got there and it was probably worse. Mom is the other person feels the brunt of her anger. She was mad most of the day, but my patient mother spent the day with her to make sure she stayed safe. They did go to the grocery store and work on some baby quilts. One thing grandma can still do is sew baby quilts. She is not as good as she use to be, but she can do it with some help. Ann went by and picked grandma up and took her to dinner at Aunt Anita's and Uncle Darrel's. Grandma got to see the kids which helps, but it was still a tough day for her.

I know yesterday was a hard day for all of my family. I especially hate it for Doneece. The first time you see her like that is the worse. I wish I was in Lubbock so I could rush over and take care of grandma. It would be so nice if I was there to take care of her and everyone could continue on with what they need to do. I just feel so bad that everyone else takes out time to take care of grandma and I can't do much from here.

I am not sure what we are going to do about grandma and her anger. She goes back to the doctor in November, which will just make her mad. She hates going to the doctor and does not cooperate while there. Hopefully something will change soon. Please just keep us in your prayers.